Drink the Coffee After Breakfast
Photo credit: http://giphy.com/search/coffee/10
We all do it. Wake up, ignore the existential dread, and reach for coffee like it’s a life preserver. But what if—and hear me out—your 7 a.m. caffeine hit is actually the reason your mornings feel like one long, slow crash?
Here’s a wild idea: eat something first.
I know, I know—what kind of monster delays coffee?
But if you’re sick of the jitters, the heartburn, the brain fog, and the 11:30 emotional unraveling, here’s why flipping the order might actually save your morning.
1. Coffee First = Crash Later
When you start your day with caffeine and nothing else, your blood sugar tanks by mid-morning. That “awake” feeling? It’s borrowed energy. And the invoice hits fast. Breakfast first = balanced energy. Coffee after = sustained calm power. Think less rollercoaster, more electric glide.
2. Protect Your Gut Before You Burn It Down
Drinking coffee on an empty stomach is like throwing espresso at drywall and calling it architecture. It messes with your stomach acid, irritates your gut lining, and can trigger reflux you definitely didn’t budget for. A meal is the buffer. Your esophagus will thank you.
3. Let Your Body Actually Absorb Things
Coffee contains compounds that interfere with the absorption of iron, calcium, and other essentials—especially if you drink it before your body has a chance to process anything else. So that nutrient-rich smoothie you made? Wasted. Eat first. Let your cells win something.
4. Stop Fueling Your Anxiety With Espresso
Let’s be honest: that early morning anxiety spiral isn’t just life. Caffeine spikes cortisol. Fast. Add an empty stomach and you've got a recipe for a full-blown overthinking episode by 8:15. Breakfast = hormonal armor. Coffee after = a gentler high with less panic attack energy.
5. Brain Fog Is Not a Personality Trait
Coffee sharpens focus. But focus means nothing without fuel. If you want your brain to actually retain information instead of just spiraling at a faster pace, give it protein. Fat. Carbs. Then give it caffeine. That’s how you get clarity and emotional regulation.
6. Heartburn Called. It Wants a Word.
If your post-coffee burps taste like regret, you’re not imagining things.
Coffee loosens your LES (lower esophageal sphincter, aka the bouncer of your gut). Eating first gives that muscle a fighting chance.
Trust me: you deserve a morning without acid flashbacks.
7. Coffee Tastes Better When It’s Not an Emergency
There’s something romantic about sipping coffee after breakfast. It becomes a ritual, not a crutch. A pleasure, not a necessity. You actually taste it, instead of inhaling it like it owes you rent.
Final Thought: Maybe Your Morning Routine Is Just... Coping
You don’t need to give up coffee. You just need to stop letting it parent you.
Eat first. Then sip slow.
Reclaim your mornings like someone who doesn’t let caffeine dictate their mood or their bowels.
This isn’t about wellness. It’s about not being wrecked before noon.
Food first. Coffee after. World domination whenever you’re ready.
